Jonas and Alison were married in the spring of 99.
She was quite a pretty woman, the type that most men will
desire. She wasn't looking for too much in a man but that he should love her,
be faithful and committed to their future together. This is every woman's
dream, I guess!
About three years into their marriage, he accepted a sales rep job with a
company based in Nottingham, which put a strain on their relationship because
of the distance between work and home. Although he would come home most
weekends, it was quite obvious (with the passing of time) that Jonas had become
a visitor in his own home. “Something just didn’t feel right about him anymore”
– said Alison.
The first indication of this, according to Alison, was his sense of hurriedness to go back to Nottingham. Whenever he came back home, he always seemed to talk regularly about work and Nottingham. As if she and the children did no longer matter in his world. She's asked him on a few occasions for her and the children to come spend some time with him in Nottingham. That way, she and the children will get to see this wonderful place that daddy always talks about. But each time she brought up the suggestion, he seemed to give some flimsy excuses for why it was not the best idea.
He would say things like "Oh, can't you see that we would disrupt the children's schooling by moving them around like that – I think they're happier here in Slough." Or he would say, “There’s no urgency in it, we will know when the time is right. Let's give it some more time, besides my work there may soon be coming to an end." So she decided to let the matter rest, knowing that he wasn't at all willing for it to happen.
Alison is quite amiable. She's not one to hurt a fly, and she would do anything to avoid an argument – especially with her husband. She resolved to carry on with her life, hoping that someday she might be able to convince him otherwise. Perhaps, maybe he'll get another job that'll mean he is closer home or better still, he would be relocated back to Slough since his work there will soon come to an end.
On the eve of their 5th anniversary, she was contacted by a stranger via email. The email sender introduced herself as Jonas’s wife, portraying this through pictures contained in the email. There were loads of pictures of him and the woman with a kid that she claimed she had for Jonas. Since he wasn't due home until later at night, Alison calmed herself in wait for his return. She felt it was imprudent to jump into conclusions without first hearing his version of the story. So she waited!
But there was no denying it, the evidences were too compelling. There were pictures upon pictures showing him, the woman and the kid from the woman at the christening of the baby and also some pictures of his birthday celebration.
The first indication of this, according to Alison, was his sense of hurriedness to go back to Nottingham. Whenever he came back home, he always seemed to talk regularly about work and Nottingham. As if she and the children did no longer matter in his world. She's asked him on a few occasions for her and the children to come spend some time with him in Nottingham. That way, she and the children will get to see this wonderful place that daddy always talks about. But each time she brought up the suggestion, he seemed to give some flimsy excuses for why it was not the best idea.
He would say things like "Oh, can't you see that we would disrupt the children's schooling by moving them around like that – I think they're happier here in Slough." Or he would say, “There’s no urgency in it, we will know when the time is right. Let's give it some more time, besides my work there may soon be coming to an end." So she decided to let the matter rest, knowing that he wasn't at all willing for it to happen.
Alison is quite amiable. She's not one to hurt a fly, and she would do anything to avoid an argument – especially with her husband. She resolved to carry on with her life, hoping that someday she might be able to convince him otherwise. Perhaps, maybe he'll get another job that'll mean he is closer home or better still, he would be relocated back to Slough since his work there will soon come to an end.
On the eve of their 5th anniversary, she was contacted by a stranger via email. The email sender introduced herself as Jonas’s wife, portraying this through pictures contained in the email. There were loads of pictures of him and the woman with a kid that she claimed she had for Jonas. Since he wasn't due home until later at night, Alison calmed herself in wait for his return. She felt it was imprudent to jump into conclusions without first hearing his version of the story. So she waited!
But there was no denying it, the evidences were too compelling. There were pictures upon pictures showing him, the woman and the kid from the woman at the christening of the baby and also some pictures of his birthday celebration.
You can't explain things like this away. You can't blame it
on circumstances. Things don't just happen!
Confronted with all the evidence, he said he was sorry and that he could
explain but Alison was distrust and very angry. Hence, a mild scuffle ensued.
This is rather understandable giving the confusion that her husband’s
infidelity and secrecy had created. She had to vent her emotions somehow!
Eventually, she got the long arm of the law involved, and they escorted the man
out of the house that same night. To make matters worse, she got a court order
to stop him from coming to the house, weeks after the episode. Most people in
my shoes would do the same thing, she said.
In the spring of 2004, they were divorced, after just five years of marriage!
In the spring of 2004, they were divorced, after just five years of marriage!
Jonas was later prosecuted for bigamy and he was instructed by the magistrate
to pay damages amounting to £250,000 to Alison, plus a monthly allowance of
£10,000 for the up keep of the children. Despite these compensations, she is yet to recover
from the pain that the experience has caused her, 13 years on. She doesn't
think she could ever trust a man again, and every attempt at having a
relationship has been epileptic at best.
Shantel, the first daughter from her marriage with Jonas is 18 now, but she
doesn't want to know her father because of the hellish situation that he'd put
them through. She thinks he is a selfish, self centred and self-seeking person
who doesn’t deserve to be called a dad.
Alison and Jonas dated for about 8 months before marriage and she remembers those first two months into their courtship, when she visited his flat in London for the first time. There were ladies clothes and panties in one of the wardrobe in the bedroom, but he said these belonged to his sister who occasionally spent the night in the flat. She never thought to enquire more from his sister because she loved him and didn’t want to upset their relationship. But should one truly trust someone after just two months of meeting them?
She wished now that she had been a little more inquisitive. Perhaps all these could have been avoided. But alas! The deed has been done! Her marriage to Jonas ended in bitterness and grave disappointment.
Alison and Jonas dated for about 8 months before marriage and she remembers those first two months into their courtship, when she visited his flat in London for the first time. There were ladies clothes and panties in one of the wardrobe in the bedroom, but he said these belonged to his sister who occasionally spent the night in the flat. She never thought to enquire more from his sister because she loved him and didn’t want to upset their relationship. But should one truly trust someone after just two months of meeting them?
She wished now that she had been a little more inquisitive. Perhaps all these could have been avoided. But alas! The deed has been done! Her marriage to Jonas ended in bitterness and grave disappointment.
The story you've just read is a real life account but the names have been changed to protect the identity of the people.
The Marriage Workshop
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